SALVAGING THE "ROCKLAND"

This is the "Rockland," a 22-inch, made-in-China, beginner's-kit bass drum that a friend of mine found on the side of the road.  He gave it to me to see if I could salvage it.

Well, you know I can.....

My direful distressed drum diagnosis was that this poor kick drum that had been literally "kicked to the curb"  just needed some urgent care and attention.  The most obvious ailment was the thick layer of dust and grime that covered every surface of it.  That could be easily remedied with a thorough polishing, which would shine up the wrap and all of the chrome parts, including the metal hoops which were beginning to rust.  Upon further examination, I discovered the inside of the drum remained in excellent condition and suffered no ill effects from its recent exposure, though the black wrap on the outside had rippled in some areas (probably due to heat and direct sunlight).

All of the parts were present and accounted for, with the exception of the extension section on one of the bass drum legs.  For some reason I initially thought this minor part could easily be replaced, since it is a simple, straight piece of leg with a round rubber foot on the end.  How hard could that be to replace or duplicate?  I would soon discover that this little lost part would be the major issue that would hold up my progress on this undertaking for weeks.

And so my pleasant polishing project proceeded.  In no time I had everything bright and shiny again..... except for the legs.  Those I had set aside to address later.  If you look closely in this first "After" photo, you can see the holes on the side of the shell where the legs should go:

So the chrome and the wrap cleaned up beautifully, the rust on the rims came off and I put a new Evans head on the kick side.  All that was left to do was to install some new legs that I had tracked down and bought to replace the existing ones.  I had to do this because when I was removing the old legs I ran into a little trouble.  For reasons known only to the Chinese craftsmen who first put this drum together, they must have squirted some kind of "Loc-Tite Threadlocker" solution down into the mounting holes because backing out the screws on the leg-mounting brackets was next to impossible.  In fact, two of the six screws actually broke off in the process, and of those two I was only able to successfully remove one of the broken-off screws.

That meant I had a three-hole mounting bracket with one mounting hole ruined, which meant I had to replace the whole leg, which meant I had to replace both legs (so they would match).  So this project ground to a screeching halt until replacement parts could be ordered.  To further exacerbate the problem, when the new legs arrived a week later the darn mounting holes did not line up with the holes in the shell, which put me back to square one.

After contemplating multiple options that involved switching out parts and/or drilling new shell holes, the only workable solution in the end was to use the original mounting brackets with the new legs.  One mounting bracket has only two of the three mounting screws, but I bought new stainless-steel screws and fender washers that hold it more securely than the former cheap Chinese screws did.  The shell holes remain unaltered and the new arrangement looks and functions fine.

And all this trouble was caused because some smart-alec leg-installer decided to "Loc-Tite" the damb screw holes.  What a joick*.  Well, it wasn't enough to prevent me from completing this project.  My professional percussion prognosis is that this sturdy little kick drum will live to rock another day.

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*This terms means "jerk" as Curly of The Three Stooges would say it.